Babies Don't Keep

Since having Eli, that poem (Babies Don't Keep) has been somewhat of a motto for living.  Despite the demands of being a wife, mom, daughter, granddaughter, sister, friend, etc (and, for three months, a teacher too!), I've tried to remind myself that Eli is only a baby for so long.  He's going to grow up, become more independent, and, one day, leave home.  (And, as sad as that makes me to think about, I really don't think I want a 40 year old son at home with me, sorry Eli!).

Knowing all of this, I've tried to completely and fully enjoy every moment and every stage.  I've tried not to be anxious for the next exciting thing, but to enjoy my son, exactly the way that he is, each day.  This past week has been a reminder of that motto, and a challenge to it.

A week ago today, I sat outside for the graveside services for a former student.  A boy I taught for two years passed away, somewhat unexpectedly.  As his mother sat on the front row, in tears, my heart ached in a way that it never had before.  I thought of the pain she most certainly was going through, completely unable to imagine how much she must hurt.  Her sweet little boy was no longer hers to hold.  I thought about the words to the poem as I rushed home to grab up my sweet little darlin and snuggle him with a new sense of appreciation.  Babies don't keep - nor do we have a say on how long we keep them.

As I mentioned in my last post, the hubs has been gone for over a week.  He's in NC, in the swing of school, and Eli and I will join him next week, when our apartment is ready.  It's been so hard to have him gone.  I have thought of single moms and military wives so many times since he's left, with the utmost respect and awe at what they do.  I am not cut out for either role and praise God, He knows that!  It's been much harder than I thought having JP gone, specifically at night.  In my 8 month update on Eli, I shared that he'd become a champion sleeper - and he had!  For two or three weeks, he went down for naps and bedtime without a glitch, and woke once (sometimes not at all!) in the night.  Well, he got off schedule the day before JP left (because of being at his other grandmas, and a meeting that we had, etc) and has been a bit off ever since.  He's been waking up two and three times a night, and making me crazy (and exhausted).  One night, it took all I had not to call JP and just have him on the phone - someone else to experience the misery.

However, I'm trying to remind myself that "babies don't keep".  Even though the night wakings are sooooo hard, it's precious when I pick up my crying son and he snuggles up to me, as if every care in the world is somehow removed.  It's adorable (though, a bit annoying) when he claps his hands in the night when he can tell I'm fretted with him (because, he's learned it's a surefire way to get me to smile).  Babies don't keep.  And I'm determined to enjoy my sweet little son while he's mine to hold.

by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton
Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing and butter the bread,
Sew on a button and make up a bed.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.Oh, I’ve grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
(Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).
The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew
And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo
But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo.
Look! Aren’t her eyes the most wonderful hue?
(Lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).

The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,
For children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

If you're happy and you know it...

Eli is at such a fun age!  He's at a stage where he, near daily, does something new for us to smile and marvel over.  In the past two-three weeks he has learned to army crawl, started crawling off his belly, figured out how to click his tongue and make raspberries (and imitate others who do the same) and he can clap his hands.  More specifically, he claps his hands when I sing "If you're happy and you know it clap your hands."  Seriously.  It is so stinkin' adorable I can hardly handle the preciousness.  It melts my heart every single time. 

He's pretty consistent - does it about 8 times out of 10.  And, I'm going to guess that those other 2 or so times he doesn't do it, he's just not happy.  We can't be happy all the time, right?

Well, if I were doing "If you're happy and you know it", my record would be worse than Eli.  The hubs is away, which makes for a pretty unhappy wife.  I am oh so blessed to be married to my best friend in the entire world.  He was my best friend before we ever started dating, and has been ever since.  No one is as good a companion, and no one "gets me" as much as he does. 

He's in Charlotte two weeks early because our apartment isn't ready yet, but classes have started.  He's staying with the Andersons (who are soooooo nice and gracious to host him) and I'm at my mom and dads.  We're hanging in there, but it sucks.  A lot.  I have no idea how military wives or single moms do it.  Really.

When JP started applying to graduate schools, lots of people asked if I would be joining him.  There was no (thought of) Eli at the time, and people wondered if I would just continue in my job and stay in our place in Cville (or with my folks) and he would go off to whichever school he chose and come home on occasion to visit.  Both JP and I got this question from co-workers, and both of us were puzzled.  Was that really a viable option?  Did people really do that?

For us, it was never a consideration.  JP has been gone since Friday at 7:30am and I've missed him since Friday at 6:00pm (all day my brain kept thinking he wasn't really gone, that he was just at work).  I hate him being away - especially in the evenings, when I just want to cuddle on the couch and talk about our days, or our thoughts.  In moments of weakness I think I won't make it until the 31st (yes, I know I will in fact, survive until then) so I can not fathom doing a long distance marriage for 2 years while he's in school.  YUCK.  No thank you.

Anyhow, I'm glad this is just for two weeks.  Then, my little family will be reunited in Charlotte.  And when I sing "If you're happy and you know it" to Eli, we can both (all three!!) clap our hands!

My 8 month of bundle of joy...

Even without a full-time job outside the home, life is so busy.  I sometimes wonder how I did it all when I was working (the answer to that is, I didn't, and definitely not well).  I still struggle to have time to do things I want to do, like update this here blog.

I've been writing a lot more for Cross Moms - all of my Christmas in July posts are over there.  That series has been such a wonderful blessing to write.  It has kept me in the Word on a more consistent, regular basis, and has taught be SO much about God's character.  If you haven't had a chance to take a look, I'd love for you to pop over and read them.

Anyhow, my writing over there has kept me busy, and with an 8 month old who has now nearly mastered army crawling and needs more constant attention, I have a little less time on my hands.  My wonderful, wonderful husband took a morning off today, and has blessed me with a little bit of time to myself.  I absolutely love spending time with my boys, but it's nice to be able to get away and recharge every once in a while.  After a doctor's appointment, my morning has been spent in the cafe at Barnes and Noble, with a frozen strawberry lemonade, and time to pick out a good book and blog.  So, without further ado, here's a bit of an update on my precious little one and all that's going on in his 8 month old life.

Mobility:  As mentioned, Eli is army crawling and moving like crazy.  You can't take your eye off of him for a minute.  He's curious and into everything.  Both my mom, and a friend who has two daughters told me that their girls were never so wild.  Such is the life with a boy I suppose, and Eli is ALL boy.  He wiggles and squirms and hardly likes to sit still a minute.  He's able to go from sitting to standing on his own (pulling up on things) and can go from sitting to crawling and back to sitting again.  It's been fun to watch all his new moves (though, I honestly wasn't encouraging the crawling, as I knew that would mean the end of life as I know it).

Food:  Eli has been eating solid foods since a little past 6 months.  He has tried avocado, banana, applesauce, pears, plums, carrots, sweet potato, squash, green beans, peas, and, recently, chicken.  He's a great eater and has liked everything except the avocado so far.  Pretty much made all of his food, which hasn't been bad.  He's currently eating two meals a day (breakfast and dinner) and we're planning to add in solids at lunch around 9 months.  We've been taking it slow, and still mostly focusing on nursing at this age.  Speaking of which...

Nursing:  Is still going well.  Since I finished the school year, Eli rarely gets bottles, but he still takes one or two every now and then, and is a champ about going back and forth.  He nurses pretty frequently during the day (3-4 hrs), but only gets up once at night.  The night before last he slept 12 hours straight, which was a first.  He is a very distracted nurser as of late though - he wants to look all over, make faces and noises and ensure that he isn't missing anything.  A few people have asked how long we plan to nurse, and I don't have a definite answer.  Right now, I'm thinking definitely past a year, but I guess the best answer is, as long as we both want to.

Sleep: Is going SOOOOOO well, and I am incredibly thankful.  Sleep hasn't always been easy with Eli, and we were hoping to avoid him having to cry it out for long periods of time, but also wanted to be sure he developed good sleeping habits (including the ability to go to sleep on his own).  I'm happy to report that he regularly, and consistently puts himself to sleep with little to (usually) no tears.  Crying is the exception rather than the rule, and even when he does cry, it's usually just 2-3 minutes, if that.  He puts himself to sleep without any rocking, screaming or even nursing at naps and at night.  It has NOT always been this way, and I am so glad for the progress he's made.  It makes for a much happier household.

Other:  Eli is such a blessing and an amazing source of joy.  I truly can't imagine life without him and am thankful God knew better than our plans.  My life has changed in so many ways and it is better than I could ever imagine.  Sure, we have rough days, money is tight, and there are struggles, but I wouldn't change a thing.  8 months (plus) after his arrival, we are more in love with our little one than we ever thought possible.