One month away from a year!

Eli will 11 months tomorrow.  He is ONE MONTH away from a year, and is birthday party is a month from yesterday.  This year has gone by so so fast, and I've tried to enjoy every single minute of it.

Sometimes, I get teary eyed thinking about how much he's changed.  The background on my cell phone is a picture of me holding Eli on the day he was born.  It blows my mind how much he's changed.  The little (big) 9lb baby, who would only sleep on our arms, nursed constantly and could be left laying just about anywhere has been replaced by a baby who, honestly, looks more and more like a little boy every day.  He sleeps a solid 12 hrs every night, goes down like a champ, is constantly on the move and is into EVERYTHING.  I haven't tried to rush through any of his stages.  The words "I'll be glad when he..." are not a part of our vocabulary.  Each day with that sweet sweet boy is such a blessing.  And as much as I sometimes miss my snuggly child, I'm really enjoying him just as he is.

At 11 months Eli:
- can say a few words!!!  He says Mama and Dada (still not 100% sure if he knows what he's saying), Mum Mum, book (without the k sound) and duck (again, it sounds like duck without the k sound).  For all three of those he definitely knows what they mean!  It's so neat that he's starting to (verbally) communicate with us!
- LOVES to read.  We seriously read a dozen books a day, at least.  He loves to turn the pages, so we only read board books for now, and he will hold them up and say "book" to request a reading.  It's adorable.  Sometimes when we're in his room playing he'll crawl over to my lap and say "book".  Melt. my. heart.  I love it.
- is really into making messes!  Some of his favorite things to do are pulling down all the board books from his shelf (every. last. one), throwing all the toys out of his pack n play, and opening his dresser drawers and tossing his clothes on the floor.  Yep - these things spell fun.  Sometimes it can be slightly annoying, but really, I don't mind too much.  He's just so stinkin cute.
- has developed a wonderful relationship with his Dada.  They walk Ollie together and play together regularly.  When JP gets home, Eli is so excited and reaches for him almost immediately.  It makes this Mama so happy to see and hear her boys playing together, laughing and enjoying one another so much.
- crawls everywhere.  He follows me around the house and is QUICK.  He also pulls up on everything and can stand using a wall.  He also cruises on furniture!  Walking may not be too far away (though we're not in any hurry)
- sleeps and naps like a little champ!
- likes to snuggle in the mornings and when he first wakes up from a nap.  It's usually just for a few minutes but we soak it all in - most of the day he wants to move and play on his own (unless he's sitting in our laps for a story).

And, at 11 months, Eli brings us more joy than we could have ever dreamed.  He is such a wonderful blessing and we thank God for him daily!

I want to be just like her....

This article  sparked an excellent conversation between the hubs and I last night.  (Unfortunately, the conversation began at 11:45pm and we didn't get to sleep until after 1:30am, which means for droopy eyes and a bit of a headache this morning - sigh.)  It was a good conversation nonetheless.

I have wonderful friends who are also fantastic wives and mothers.  In many of them, I see particular giftings.

One of my friends is an excellent writer (seriously, you should check our her blog, free book, and the book that will be published soon).  Her home is also beautiful.  It makes me feel like I'm stepping into a copy of Southern Living every time I enter its doors.

I have another friend who is always oh so put together.  Her hair is styled regularly, and she has an uncanny ability to make it look like the hairdresser does every. single. day.  She also has a super cute wardrobe, is great with makeup and is always coordinated and fashionable.  (My hair looks styled the 2-3 times a year it gets cut, and no one would ever, EVER call my wardrobe fashionable).

A third friend is a fabulous cook and is also incredibly healthy.  The meals she feeds her husband and son are usually made from scratch, using wholesome, organic ingredients.  She is excellent about doing research and making informed decisions regarding the health and well being of her son and family.

I could continue making lists of my friends and their awesomeness, but I'll stop.  You get the point.  I have friends that are incredibly successful in prestigious careers, friends that are insanely fit physically, etc etc.  And that's all wonderful (I am friends with some pretty fabulous people).

The problem is, I've got this other friend, who, really, is more of a foe.  She's a magnificent writer with a spotless, uncluttered, beautifully decorated home.  She is lean and incredibly fit, great at a plethora of sports.  However, she doesn't hang out in her gym clothes, but rocks a fashionable wardrobe, always put together with the right clothes, accessories, shoes and her hair and makeup are flawless.  She cooks healthy and delicious meals for breakfast, lunch and dinner.  Her kids all slept through the night at 6 weeks old and are happy all the time - as is her husband.  And, why wouldn't they be.  He has the perfect wife and the children have a perfect mom.  Except, THIS PERSON DOESN'T EXIST.

I have this tendency to take all the awesomeness of every wife, mom and friend I know, put it all together, and create this super wife/mom/woman.  Then, I strive to be just. like. her.  Except I can't, and neither can she, because there is no such thing.

Instead of striving after a fictitious model, I need to do a better job of looking to Christ.  As the writer of the aforementioned article stated, my job description is to love God, love my husband and love my child and point him to Jesus.  I need to seek His guidance for things like how and what to feed my family, and how to spend our time.  I need to do what He calls me to do, and stop trying to be who he has made everyone else.  I need to rest in Him, and stop worrying and fretting about if I'm getting this whole thing right.

Does anyone else think that is SOOOO much easier said than done??

Right where I'm supposed to be

On Saturday I wrote about how I love my life and it's true, I do.  However, lest you think it's all butterflies and roses, I thought I should mention that, well, it's not.

A lot of my life is spent in the mundane.  I change diapers and clothes and wash them, along with all the other laundry.  I go to the grocery store, cook and clean.  I am in the house apartment for most of the day because a certain someone needs his morning and afternoon nap and, since it's just me and the munchkin, a lot of days are spent in pjs and workout clothes (and no, that doesn't mean I'm getting in great workouts during the naps). The majority of my days are not glamorous.  Actually, in all honesty, I wouldn't know glamorous if it hit me in the face.  

Today, I missed teaching.  Like, really missed it.  I missed getting up, getting dressed and heading off to a (semi) professional environment.  I missed walking around my classroom facilitating learning.  I missed asking kids questions to get them thinking about things differently, and helping light bulbs go off in their heads.  I missed collaborating with my coworkers to plan fantastic lessons - the kinds of lessons that my students would talk about, even after they left my class.  Believe it or not, I even missed faculty meetings - interacting with other teachers, sitting and taking notes and eating chocolate.  

In addition to missing teaching, I also started to fantasize about being a career business person (for both the excitement of the job, and the financial security that would come with it).  I  dreamed of being this business lady - you know, the kind that wears the super put together, business suits with splashes of color (and doesn't get spit/drooled/peed on), heels and jewelry (as in that stuff your kid pulls at all the time) and heads to an office (think the skyscrapers that adorn Uptown Charlotte).  I'd stop at a quaint coffee shop for a beverage and pastry before rushing to get to a meeting on time.  Then on my lunch break (I've never had one of those before!) I'd go with a friend to a fancy clothing store and get a cute dress for a work function that was coming up, and then get to go from a sandwich place around the corner.  It'd be grand.

Eventually, I snapped out of it and came back to reality.  Even for all the glamour, financial security and prestige, I wouldn't trade places with "that girl" who has that career business life.  I wouldn't even go back in the classroom.  My life might be full of mundane, and many might call it simple, but it's good.  I know that I'm where I'm supposed to be - in my home, taking care of my family.

Today I didn't do anything fancy. I went to the grocery store today and made my husband's dinner tonight.  There is apple crisp baking the oven.  My apartment is not a wreck and I spent all day with my son.  It might not have included a business suit, heels, jewelry, or clothes shopping, but it's been a good day and I am thankful, even for time to do the mundane.

I love my life!

Lately, I have struggled a lot with contentment.  It's difficult to be in a new city, especially one that I wasn't excited about moving to from the beginning, as a new mom who is at home with a 10 month old most of the day every day.  It's been a challenge to adjust to a (much) smaller place and to go from owning a townhouse to renting an apartment.  I also haven't loved JP being on a student schedule.  I know that, in reality, I'm tremendously blessed in so many ways.  But often, I struggle to see that.

Well, I saw it today.

Today was what JP and I jokingly referred to as my "spoil" day.  A few weeks ago, we were talking about me being at home, and he said he felt like he was getting spoiled with lots of yummy meals, a clean house, his lunch being made, etc.  I jokingly asked when I get to be spoiled and we decided I could have a "spoil" day for my birthday.  My parents were in town on my actual birthday, and then we were both getting ready for trips out of town, so today was the big day.

JP asked me what I wanted to do and said that anything I wanted (well, within budgetary limitations) was fair game.  I could get out for some shopping, get a pedicure, he'd cook every meal and do all the dishes - the sky was the limit.

I pondered for a while, trying to think of what to do to get the most out of the day (I mean, how often does an offer like this come around?).  I settled on a just a few small things pretty quickly - I wanted an uninterrupted night's sleep, complete with the ability to sleep in (ie. JP give Eli a bottle when he woke) and JP to cook/clean dinner (stir fry).  I decided to play the rest of the day by ear.

I went to sleep around midnight last night, and woke up around 5:45 puzzled that Eli hadn't gotten up (since he went down at 6:45).  I tossed and turned until 6:30, waiting for him to get up to eat, but he never did.  Even though I didn't have to feed him, I wanted to.  This surprised me.  The sleep that I had longed for didn't seem as important when I really wanted to snuggle my little munchkin.

Eli slept extra late (8:30!) and I did feed him when I got up (a little before 9).  Then, I went to a weight watchers meeting solo and came home.  JP said he was about to put him to bed, and I jumped in, offering to do it.

Once he went down for the nap, the hubs inquired as to what I'd decided to do - the shopping trip?  a pedicure?  what.  Instead of some "time away", I opted for lunch at Chipotle, with my boys, and then some frozen yogurt.  We took a stroll through the park, and sat on a rock to eat the yogurt, while Eli enjoyed crawling through the grass.  We came home, and all three went down for an afternoon nap.  Then, JP made dinner while I worked on organizing some photos.

It hasn't been a glamorous day, and really, it hasn't been much different than how lots of days are spent, except having JP around more and his cooking/cleaning.  But, honestly, I didn't want it to be much different.  I love my life.  I love my husband so much, and I adore our sweet little boy.  I enjoy being with them more than anything in the world, and there is nothing else I'd really prefer to do.  Even on my spoil day.

(Disclaimer:  Since it was my "spoil" day, I may have sent JP to the grocery store for some white cheddar popcorn.....)

On training a child and raising a dog, I mean....

training a dog and raising a child.  Really, it sometimes feels like it's all the same.  (At least, it does for right now).

When we decided to sell our house at the end of March, our realtor strongly suggested finding a place for Ollie for while it was on the market.  Her reasoning made a lot of sense - it's hard enough to keep a house show-ready with a baby, much less a 75lb dog, plus, not everyone is a dog lover, and some people have it made up in their minds that they don't want to live in a house after a dog has.

So, Ollie went and stayed with my parents, on their 110 acres.  He and their dog, a german shepherd named Athena, were able to run freely through open fields, explore in the woods, and take a dip in the creek, all at their leisure.  They slept in the garage and were, basically, outdoor dogs by day.

Ollie loved it.  He ended up being there from the very end of March, until September 5th, when we moved into our apartment, since the whole Mays clan was there after the house sold.  Now, he's gone from having free reign of 110 acres, to having less than 1000 square feet.

I have to be honest, I was not excited to be transitioning back to apartment life after owning our own townhouse and then living at my parents.  I also have to be honest about saying a few times that the apartment is "too small for a married couple, a child and a 75lb dog".  My wonderful husband lovingly reminded me that people all over the world, with bigger families, live in much smaller spaces.  He also reminded me of some dear friends we have that live in a small 2 bedroom 1 bathroom house with their THREE children and dog about the size of Ollie.  We DO NOT need more space.  That is the great American lie.  We can do just fine with far less than we think.

Anyhow, it's been fine being back in a smaller space (even with my folks coming and staying with us for a few days), but it's still a challenge living with a dog and baby who aren't so used to interacting.  It's not that they want to hurt each other, but they don't realize that they have sharp claws, or that they shouldn't pull tails.  I feel like a constant referee, Ollie, "don't lick Eli", "Eli don't lick Ollie" (sadly, that isn't a joke).  I have to be sure Ollie doesn't go to scratch his nose and puncture Eli in the process, or that Eli doesn't pounce on Ollie and decide to pull out a bit of hair for an afternoon snack.  It can certainly be exhausting.

However, we've learned little things to help make the adjustment better.  Ollie isn't allowed in Eli's room, which makes it easier for E to play on the floor without me having to interfere as much.  When I have to go into the kitchen or bathroom, into the pack n play Eli goes.  We're getting there...

But today, I found myself using a dog trick on Eli.  He was headed to the shoes, which are his favorite chew toy (see why I get them confused??) and I wanted him to keep away from the shoes and come back to where I was, without my having to get up from my food.  So, what'd I do?  I called him "Eli, come get this" and I threw a gourd from my table arrangement on the floor.  Yes, you read that correctly.  I resorted to throwing things (gourds, no less) for Eli (yes, the child, not the dog) to come fetch.  Then, when Ollie came running after it, I said "not you Ollijah".  Oh dear.

Really and truly though, Ollie is a wonderful dog, who lets Eli play with him and never seems to mind being crawled over.  Eli LOVES Ollie and enjoys chasing him around the apartment.  They are ridiculously cute together, and are sure to become the best of pals.  Even if they end up driving their mama a little nuts in the process :)